Day 2 {Jimmy Fallon}

So I have no wi-fi for some reason and the computer guy is randomly gone this WEEK so I'm dying on the regular main computer/my laptop on the Eathernet cable. It sucks but I'll live, So the schedule was to do Sully and Denise today (hence the reason why Julian drove me home and walked me into the studio) but they changed the schedule (AGAIN) to Nick Burns at 3PM which is cool too but I'm not in it. Which is lame. At 10AM they filmed their NRA commercials and to do so Seth had to dress up in this sexy costume. I hope you love it.

This is the last post for November! Or Novembeard or No-Shave November as some of my peers call it. But it's actually been pretty fun. LET'S RE-CAP:

We found out the Agyness is a raging WHORE

Jon Hamm hosted SNL

I went to London

I discovered my own personal Fanfiction site

I went to Ireland

I went to Scotland

I went back to London 

I went to Holland

I went to Sweden

I went back to Scotland

I went to Mallorca

I met Conan O'Brien

I was on Conan

Scarlett Johansson hosted SNL

I watched A Clockwork Orange

I went to Denmark

I had my first Thanksgiving with Julian 

I watched The Blair Witch Project and Anti-Christ

Anne Hathaway hosted SNL

I went to Westchester, New York

I went ice skating with Jimmy and Seth

We helped Jimmy out with some issues

and

I got asked to be in a series on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon!! (I said yes)

It's been another amazing month here in New York City and I couldn't have asked for a better one. SEE YOU IN DECEMBER!

Day 1 {Jimmy Fallon}

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Quick! To the Writing Cave!

K, Q, U X, Y, Z are all the letters my blog entries haven't started on (except for Q now) so I'm going to try and incorporate those in incoming posts. Today is Sunday which means it's the last day of my break...nooooo...I have to write a paper and read 2 stories by Nathaniel Hawthorne and take notes on them...nooooo...BUT we do have our scenes for this week!


Fox News Cold Open (Bobby, Bill, Kristen, Abby, Paul, Jason)
Monologue (Amy, Tina, Will Ferrel, Darrell Hammond)
Subshack (Jimmy, Nasim, Kristen, Jay)
NRA (Bill, Jimmy, Seth)
Siamese Twins (Amy, Christina, Jimmy, Seth)
Nick Burns (Abby, Fred, Taran, Jimmy)
Sully and Denise (Christina, Abby, Jimmy, Bobby)
Update (Tina, Jimmy, Amy)
Celebrity Jeopardy (Will, Darrell, Jimmy, Nasim)
z105 (Andy, Jimmy)
Cork Soakers (Keenan, Jimmy, Christina, Taran, Jason, Andy, Fred, Vanessa, Kristen)
Brian Diaries Digital Short

Which means the stats for this week are:
Andy 2
Abby 3
Bill 2
Bobby 2
Keenan 1
Kristen 3
Jason 2
Jay 1
Nasim 2
Paul 1
Christina 3
Taran 2
Fred 2
Vanessa 1
Seth 2
These stats...suck. Why? Because Amy, Tina, Will, and Darrell are stealing spots! Damnation.

Anne Hathaway hosts SNL

Tonight’s the night! Anne’s been really upset and excited today because she’s had such a fun week but it’s also over for her. This is a reason why I love SNL because the fun is never over…it’s just keeps going and going…SNL is like the energizer bunny. Soft and cuddly. NOT. Oh speaking of things that aren’t, SNL writers aren’t lazy. They already have chosen all the scenes that we’re doing this week. I say chosen because almost all of them aren’t new. There are only a few different ones including Update and the Cold Open. Which I think is kind of lame for the writers to just have a remembering episode but as long as I’m in it just as many times as I usually am. Like if I’m only in it once this week and Amy and Tina both have 4 scenes EACH then forget it I might as well take the week off. By the way in case you haven’t noticed…I’ve had this week off for Thanksgiving. I’m sure you have noticed considering all my posts do not talk about school. But you’re smart you knew that…right?

Earlier today Kristen begged Julian and I to babysit up until 11:15 tonight and I stupidly agreed. I think I only agreed because I was watching Adventureland and her and Bill were in that movie. However during babysitting I got lots and lots of texts from Jimmy (Fallon).

1 NEW MESSAGE FROM Jimmy Fallon AT 22:14PM <There's a man here for you>

REPLY <Who?>

1 NEW MESSAGE FROM Jimmy Fallon AT 22:16PM <Mr. Veidt?>

REPLY <I don't know who that is...is he a fan?>

1 NEW MESSAGE FROM Jimmy Fallon AT 22:19PM <No he says Lorne sent him to talk to you about business affairs.>

REPLY <Who takes care of business affairs at 10 o'clock at night? Wait, WHY ARE YOU IN MY ROOM??>

Oh and the cast party was AWESOME.

1 NEW MESSAGE FROM Jimmy Fallon AT 22:24PM <I was walking by and he asked me for your room!>

REPLY <Mmmhm I bet, are you fucking with me Jimmy?>

1 NEW MESSAGE FROM Jimmy Fallon AT 22:27PM <No i swear...i'm not sure but I called Lorne just in case and he said Veidt is clear, when will you and Julian be back?>

REPLY <Supposedly 11:15, knowing Fred and Kristen most likely 11:30. Where is this guy from?>

1 NEW MESSAGE FROM Jimmy Fallon AT 22:34PM <Oh okay, he says he's from Veidt Industries.>

REPLY <Cool..sorry you have to put up with him for now I'll be home...soon.>

1 NEW MESSAGE FROM Jimmy Fallon AT 22:37PM <Oh no he seems like a cool guy. Not your type though.>

REPLY <What's my type??>

1 NEW MESSAGE FROM Jimmy Fallon AT 22:40PM <Oh you know.>

REPLY <Know what?!?!>

1 NEW MESSAGE FROM Jimmy Fallon AT 22:44PM <Christina he's BLOND>

REPLY <Oh right I'm allergic to blonds I forgot>

1 NEW MESSAGE FROM Jimmy Fallon AT 22:58PM <Trust me he's not your type.>

REPLY <Seriously explain that to me because I just do not get it.>

1 NEW MESSAGE FROM Jimmy Fallon AT 23:18PM <Well, I just see you as more of a funny guy kind of girl, brunette, clean-shaven or slightly scruffy you know?>

REPLY <Oh well when your examples are Julian and Andy I can understand that assumption...what are you and Mr. Veidt doing??>

1 NEW MESSAGE FROM Jimmy Fallon AT 23:26PM <Oh we're just hanging out...you freak.>

REPLY <You are>

1 NEW MESSAGE FROM Jimmy Fallon AT 23:32PM <...we're doing that skit now, you and me. No backing out now essenelle>

REPLY <What skit?>

1 NEW MESSAGE FROM Jimmy Fallon AT 23:34PM <Sully and Denise? You just made a sully and denise reference!>

REPLY <...should I be scared?>

1 NEW MESSAGE FROM Jimmy Fallon AT 23:36PM <Haha you should be scared>

REPLY <Wait really?>

1 NEW MESSAGE FROM Jimmy Fallon AT 23:38PM <Nah it's just a scene nothing more really>

REPLY <I'm on...! Bye!>

After the show I spoke to Mr.Veidt about the business affairs that I was unaware of.

VEIDT

I'm sorry to have met you so unnannounced and during your show, I can assure you our meeting will not continue on this pattern.

CHRISTINA

Oh no it's not problem, I more confused as to what business affairs I have to attend with you.

VEIDT

Ah yes, well, Lorne Michaels tends to think that you're rather popular now, as do I, and he thinks that a little marketing would do you some justice.

CHRISTINA

Marketing? How so?

VEIDT

Well marketing is basically a term where-

CHRISTINA

Oh no, Mr. Veidt I know what marketing is. I may not have paid for my education but I certainly got one. I was confused as to what you would do in your marketing scheme. 

VEIDT

My apologies Miss Essenelle, and please call me Adrian.

CHRISTINA

Yeah call me Christina...Miss Essenelle...

ADRIAN

Well for our 'marketing scheme' we would promote Saturday Night Live but you would be the face of it, plus we were thinking of making SNL trading cards as well.

CHRISTINA

Oh cool! But I don't think I would be as arrogant as to plaster my face on the walls of buildings to promote SNL. Just promote SNL with it's logo. Or NBC's logo.

ADRIAN

Well it'd be killing two birds with one stone. Your ratings would go up and your celebrity would go up as well.

CHRISTINA

There's more to life than being popular Adrian.

ADRIAN

I appreciate that.

CHRISTINA

I'm curious, aren't you the 'smartest man in the world'?

ADRIAN

Not self-proclaimed.

CHRISTINA

Exactly, I don't want to be the self-proclaimed image of SNL. It's rude and arrogant, people may think what they want about me but I won't share my opinion about it unless necessary.

ADRIAN

You seem to have given this a lot of thought.

CHRISTINA

Yeah and considering how packed my schedule is...

ADRIAN

Well I'll get back to you on a trading card deal with you and the others, I'll be sure not to put anything egotistical on the card.

CHRISTINA

Yes I want to proofread it!

ADRIAN

Oh but of course.

CHRISTINA

Well it was wonderful meeting you Adrian.

ADRIAN

Yes, here's my card.

CHRISTINA

You know where to find me! Literally.

ADRIAN

(laugh) most indeed.

Day 5 {Anne Hathaway}

Today was really quite epic. We filmed our TSA and the Thanksgiving skit and those were fun, Anne Hathaway is brillant as always. BUT that is not why today was epic (sorry Anne) but I was in the main lobby just writing stuff down and Jimmy (Fallon) walked in and said Hey! to me. He then asked me if I wanted to go ice skating with him and one other person. I decided to go, but not with Julian just because I wanted to hang out with some of my other friends and Julian wanted to hang out with the Strokes today, so I went with Jimmy and Seth. You'd think we'd go to Rockefeller Center but NOOO! We instead went to Lake Gracemere in Westchester, New York and skated there. It was a lot of fun, although the ice wasn't really all that thick and Seth fell and his leg went straight into the ice! He was okay but he just had to skate with one pant leg soaking wet. It was funny he was jumping around on his toepick and since this was my first time ice skating I was in between Seth (my right) and Jimmy (left) and so when he fell I was already holding onto both of their arms so I tried to pull Seth back as he was falling and Jimmy took his free hand, grabbed my waist and ripped me away from Seth and held onto me for dear life. Even interesting-er and almost awkward as Seth had one leg in the water I was still holding onto his wrist and he just gave Jimmy this look that basically said "At least she cares". And to break the tension I

CHRISTINA

I gotcha.

SETH

Geez, that was...yeah.

JIMMY

(seeing the awkward tension in SETH's gaze he let's go of CHRISTINA and pats her on the back) Alright you're safe (to SETH) now onto you. (he pulls him out of the water)

CHRISTINA

That was frightening, how cold is the water?

SETH

It's actually really nice.

JIMMY

Ha ha, I bet.

We kept on skating after that and then we went to Dunkin Donuts and drove back home to Manhattan. Seth, Jimmy, and I all weren't done having fun just yet so we stayed in Jimmy's room and watched the Blair Witch Project and Anti-Christ. Blair Witch I thought was pretty good, but Anti-Christ really wasn't my cup of tea. It was a little creepy (Blair Witch) because the lake we went ice skating on was surrounded by a forest that was quite brooding...although Jimmy would've dragged me out so I would've been fine, Seth? Not so much...oh I found a online blurb about Julian and I on Perez Hilton's website



Everyone seems to be taking this Essenancas relationship quite well but I am certainly NOT. Has anyone noticed that Christina looks about the age of 18 maybe younger?? We all know that Julian is 32, so let's do the math that's a 14 YEAR AGE DIFFERENCE. AND, she might not even be 18! She refuses to get tested to see who's her daddy because she's afraid it might be JULIAN! We all saw how capital 

G GROSS Hugh Heffner’s bunnies were and is this situation really different? Uh, no! Don’t get me wrong I love that little star. But that’s what she is, little. Plus her blog is more popular than mine so GO AWAY B**CH!

Here’s some news for you Perez, I AIN’T GOIN’ ANYWHERE. Oh by the way, yesterday while talking to Jimmy in the lobby at NBC Lorne walked by saying that he wants to add some old skits and actors into next week’s show and eventually that conversation led to Jimmy why don’t you host next week with the Roots! He agreed and next week’s guest is Jimmy Fallon with musical guest The Roots! Very cool very cool, Amy and Tina are definitely going to be on the show and Horatio might as well. Although when I was talking to Jimmy and Seth about it in the car

CHRSITINA

No offense and all Jimmy but I find it kind of annoying when old players come back to be in the skits, because it shoves out the new players.

JIMMY

Oh no I understand what you mean, they used to do that to me too since I wasn’t really a remember-able cast member.

SETH

Jimmy, that’s absolute bullshit.

CHRISTINA

Yeah seriously.

JIMMY

Yeah okay guys. What’s my most popular skit?

CHRISTINA

Your most popular anything was Weekend Update!

JIMMY

Damn…

SETH

Ha ha, nailed you on the HEAD.

JIMMY

Oh God penis rings…

Thanksgiving!

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Day 3 {Anne Hathaway}

I woke up to breakfast in bed, a kiss from Jules, and two plane tickets to COOOPEENHAAGGEEENN (Denmark). I knew I wouldn't be alone for Thanksgiving...but I was starting to get worried...but now I'm good! We leave at 10PM for JFK and arrive in Copenhagen at arround 7AM (we leave JFK at 11:30PM). I'm really excited to meet Julian's mom he talks about her a bunch and always has nice things to say and it won't be awkward that I don't speak...Danish? because Julian doesn't either and Julian's mom speaks fluent English. It's funny because obviously the Danish don't celebrate Thanksgiving but she has for the last 20 years! Oh I'm SO excited.

Today I got to meet Anne Hathaway and she's REALLY funny. She's so happy to be here as well, she's having the time of her life filming these little skits it's like we just don't stop laughing...I love it. Today we filmed Mega Mart Commercial and The Wizard of Oz. I personally loved filming the Wizard of Oz because it was one of the few scenes Fred is actually in. And he does a brillant job. Speaking of Fred their wedding planner came in this morning and was taking down details for the wedding like colors and flowers and stuff and from the sounds of it it sounds really elaborate and beautiful.

So, I was just send the youtube video "Sesame Street: Cookie Monster Auditions for Saturday Night Live" and I could not stop laughing especially at the macarooner and fake news. So I showed the video to Lorne Michaels and he said the he could POSSIBLY have Cookie Monster host SNL but we don't know yet because at the moment we're booked up until December 24th and it'd be hard for the puppet to be on stage without his person and all...but he said he'd think about it...WOO!

Bobby, Nasim, and I were going through storage at NBC looking for Martha Steward catalogues because we've been invited to be in a charity where we do arts and crafts with kids. That's on...December 8th I believe. So that'll be fun, and I think other popular young people will be there too i.e. Selena Gomez and Michael Cera. I'm excited for that, anyways I'm going to go babysit Kristen's neices and nephews (again!) with Julian and Bobby. Toodles!

Day 2 {Anne Hathaway}

Conan O'Brien is officially my best friend

Today we filmed Horse Play and Penelope which would've been fun for me if I was in them or if I wasn't having so much fun in LOS ANGELES!!!! Oh gosh I am getting back on the plane to New York now but was today a blast...I got to the Conan studios (as I like to call them) at around...10AM? Because they film a bunch of their skits early in the day so I was told to come early. Anyways throughout the entire day I was meeting stage-hands and making little webisodes for TeamCoco.com and was just having a blast and as you know I was on the show so I decided to put the transcript from the show on here: (p.s. in the beginning of the show I pretended to be Conan)

CHRISTINA

(points to ANDY who is confused, points to the band, jumps in the air and touches floor) Thank you. Thank you! (she does the string-dance and receives even more applause)Ohhkay and welcome to Conan, I am Conan hence the 9 inch stilettos (lifts up suit pant leg to show massive heels and much applause from the audience. She looks up into the audience and sees a sign that says Hug Me Conan) What does that say? 

GIRLS

HUG ME CONAN!! (the girls then start shreiking because the real Conan has come out from the back door and is huging the girls, he is wearing a white undershirt and boxers. He then looks at CHRISTINA)

CHRISTINA

How the hell did you get out!?

CONAN

I've escaped many basements before...now give me back my clothes! (CHRISTINA solemly takes off her suit and pants to reveal the same white undershirt and boxers CONAN had on) Yeah that's right, teach you to steal from me. (she then slowly walks away with her head down, she then turns her head)

CHRISTINA

I'm sorry Conan I ruined everything...(she continues walking and the crowd 'aw's in sadness) 

CONAN

What! Don't awe her! (the crowd laughs) Get back here...(CHRISTINA runs back to CONAN and jumps in his arms) 

CHRISTINA

Coco!

CONAN

Now GET OUT OF HERE.

CHRISTINA

Sorry sorry! (she scuddles off)

(15 minutes later)

CONAN

We're back, ladies and gentlemen my guest for tonight is one of the most widely known Saturday Night Live members of all time and her online blog has over 2 million viewers please welcome the one and only Christina Essenelle! (applause, CHRISTINA walks out in a dress and heels and hair back to original form. She gives CONAN a big hug and kisses him on the cheek and does the same with ANDY)You look so beautiful!

CHRISTINA

Ha ha, now that I'm out of that suit.

CONAN

My suit...good to have you here!

CHRISTINA

Good to be here. I've been excited all week.

CONAN

I know, I read your blog.

CHRISTINA

I know.

CONAN

Ha ha, so much to talk about. So as the audience may know you grew up in a fake orphanage and-

CHRISTINA

Well it wasn't a fake orphanage, it was a real orphanage just a really really bad one.

CONAN

Right, and as you wrote on your blog you said that everyone took care of eachother and you were the main person to search for food.

CHRISTINA

Right.

CONAN

Now what was it like to be the one being depended on for food? I mean was it tough or-?

CHRISTINA

Yeah it was definitely difficult to be the one everyone depended on because if I came home from school without a loaf of bread for everyone to eat, you know, someone could've died that night. And it was just really awful. Plus getting the food wasn't easy, I either had to steal it or beg for it.

CONAN

God could you imagine people in NYC watching this right now? "HEY I REMEMBER GIVIN' HER FOOD" (audience laughs)

CHRISTINA

Ha ha, actually if I stole food from a place and I remember the place I actually paid them back when I got money from SNL because I felt really bad about stealing in the first place. (audience applauses) 

CONAN

Well that's very sweet of you.

CHRISTINA

Oh Conan just out of curiosity did you put the video of me at school on your website?

CONAN

I have!  Now on teamcoco.com some of you may have seen this but when I went to New York I went to Christina's school and (audience laughs already knowing) followed her with a camera for two hours  and she had no idea that I was following her.

CHRISTINA

He's evil! I felt like such an idiot when I saw that video. (puts a pouty face on and the audience aws)

CONAN

No, no, no! Don't awe her! She got her revenge, actually do we have the clip? Can we play it? Yes? Okay, so Christina decided to pay me back with a video that they played on Saturday Night Live just this previous Saturday. (they play the clip and it ends with applause) Yeah what do you think of her now?

CHRISTINA

Ha ha, I'm a little devil...

CONAN

Now Christina this is your first time in Los Angeles correct?

CHRISTINA

This is my first time going west of New York! (audience cheers)

CONAN

Well didn't you go to Alaska?

CHRISTINA

That's not part of Canada? (audience and CONAN laugh)

CONAN 

Ha ha, no not yet.

CHRISTINA

My geography skills aren't up to par...

CONAN

Clearly not, but we have to take a commercial break but when we come back more Christina Essenelle! (during commercial break) The audience is going to piss themselves at any moment.

CHRISTINA

I know you're just too funny!

CONAN

I was talking about you!

CHRISTINA

Ha ha, arent' we perfect?!

CONAN

Ha ha, I must say though your scoliosis twins are quite voluptuous.

CHRISTINA

Ha ha, that was the intention. 

(several minutes later)

CONAN

And we're back with Christina Essenelle, so Christina I was just thinking back and you just went on a little European Tour with the Strokes last week did you not?

CHRISTINA

I did!

CONAN

And rumour has it, because it's not on your blog, that you played keyboard at one of the concerts?

CHRISTINA

Uh...that's definitely a rumour and it's funny you bring that up because there's a lot of random rumours out there about me but everyone knows that if it's not on my blog it's probably not true.

CONAN

Well like what?

CHRISTINA

Well there was the very obvious one of 'Christina and Seth Meyers went out for 5 months before she was on the show'.

CONAN

I've heard about that one!

CHRISTINA

Yeah and that's the reason why I'm on the show because I was dating Seth!

CONAN

That's absolutely ridiculous, we all know you were dating Keenan before the show started!

CHRISTINA

That's right, wait who? (laughter from audience and CONAN)

CONAN

No, the only celebrity relationships you've had were Andy Samberg for 2 weeks I believe and Julian Casablancas for-?

CHRISTINA

2 months (applause).

CONAN

Yeah and you two seem to really be just hitting it off.

CHRISTINA

Yeah...it drives people crazy. (laughter)

CONAN

Ha ha, it drives people crazy?

CHRISTINA

Yeah! No one in SNL that I know of but walking on the streets sometimes we get paparazzi who want to ask one of us a question about the other that will most likely be something nasty and they can't do that because we're rarely in public without eachother.

CONAN

I know, I was going to ask all these awful questions about Julian tonight but he's right backstage. (laughter)

CHRISTINA

Curses!

CONAN

Foiled again!

CHRISTINA

See I feel like I need to get up and do a dance number, I can't compete with Christina Aguilera...

CONAN

Hey no one's stopping you from doing a dance number.

CHRISTINA

(getting up she offers her hand to CONAN) Shall we?

CONAN

Oh now I'm involved?

CHRISTINA

Heck yeah.

CONAN

Let's do this! (he strips off his jacket and tie and gets up to join CHRISTINA) Woah it's like deja vu...

CHRISTINA

Ha ha, now cup your breasts... (laughter)

CONAN

Well now what're you going to teach me? (laughter) WHAT YOU GOT?!

CHRISTINA

I've got the power (she rips off her knee length dress to reveal a short black flapper) of ball-room dancing. (applause and laughter)

CONAN

That's definitely not a ball-room dancing dress. (she gives him a dirty look and he puts his hands on her hips) Alright alright...(they dance for a minute to the Basic Cable Band and they continue dancing when CONAN says) Everyone give a round of applause to Christina Essenelle! When we come back Tom Felton!

(after TOM's interview it's time for THE STROKES to perform)

CONAN

We're back, my next guest will be performing from their latest album Room on Fire, they'll be singing Reptilia which is availble for purchase on iTunes. Please welcome The Strokes!

JULIAN

Conan, I must say you're hair is more awesome in person. (laughter)

Their was a rousing little party after the show and I got to talk to Tom Felton and Andy Richter more and they are just some really awesome people. That's the thing I love about show biz, everyone's really funny, nice, and just overall really cool. Tom Felton is DEFINITELY my new friend, we talked for over an hour and he even played some songs on a guitar he found backstage. Plus I was a little star struck because I love Harry Potter...Draco=my lover...yeah but I had an amazing time and it sucks that I have to leave Los Angeles so early but it's been a blast! There's too many palm trees though...

Day 1 {Anne Hathaway}

So I spent 5PMyesterday-8PMtoday hanging out with ZE STROKES but not all of them for the entire time, it started off as Nick, Nikolai, Julian, and I from 5PM-11AM then Fab showed up and then we met up with Albert when we went into Union Square and messed around. It was a jolly good time, but it had to end. There was filming today! They filmed the Miley Cyrus Show and Camel Tame commercial. So I have yet to meet miss Anne Hathaway but I am excited to! I watched Phone Booth and Pineapple Express in the last 24 hours, two very good movies I had already seen phone booth which is just an awesome psychological thriller and Pineapple Express was hilarious.I hope Seth Rogen hosts the show soon I want to meet him!

TOMORROW IS THE NIGHT PEOPLE! Watch Conan tomorrow at 8PM and 10PM on TBS. And it's not just me in the episode it's Christina Essenelle, Tom Felton, and ZE STROKES!..I get to fly first class too which is exciting SHIT. WOOT. Which also means I am not filming tomorrow or Thursday. SPEAKING OF THURSDAY, I still have no plans, and I even brought it up today with The Strokes asking what everyone else is doing and no one really said anything. I'll probably end up in my room going over lines or watching TV which I'm completely fine with, I mean I can't ask people to drop everything that they've been doing for years and years! So yeah I'm completely fine with that option, I think Julian's flying to Denmark to see his mom but he's been pretty discreet about Thanksgiving which basically gives me the heads-up of "No you're not invited". Which is pretty lame considering how "in love" we are but I guess some places are just too private for girlfriends to see. Is it frustrating? Yes. Do I feel shut-out by the person who says they love me? Of course. Am I going to say anything about it? Probably not. Why? Because I don't know until the day after-thanksgiving what's going to happen. *sigh I'm on Conan tomorrow! Maybe I'll just stay a day extra in L.A., Conan did invite me to his house if I had nowhere to go. Yeah speaking of which

CONAN

So I should see you Tuesday then?

CHRISTINA

Yes that seems to be the plan.

CONAN

Wow NBC must really hate me I'm stealing you away from the show mwahahaha.

CHRISTINA

Yeah and there's no filming on Thursday due to Thanksgiving!

CONAN

Oh yeah what're you doing for Thanksgiving because of the whole orphanage thing?

CHRISTINA

I'm not exactly sure yet, no one's really offered any home up so I'll probably just stay at NBC.

CONAN

Hey you can come on over to the O'Brien residence. Of course my children get to play with you.

CHRISTINA

I'm not sure whether that's sexual or not.

CONAN

I guess you'll find out. (laughs)

CHRISTINA

Thank you for the offer I just might take you up on that,

CONAN

We'll talk more tomorrow but my wife is home. Let the boredome begin...NOW! (he's joking everyone)

CHRISTINA

Haha, see you tomorrow Coco.

CONAN

DAMN YOU TOM HANKS!!!

A Clockwork Orange

So the decision for the After Party movie was between Room 1408 a horror flick from Stephen King's novel and that one was 106 minutes and A Clockwork Orange a....philosophical flick? based on...? it's suppose to take place in future Britain and it's 137 minutes. So since I really wasn't in the mood for pissing myself we decided to watch A Clockwork Orange...what?!!? It was interesting

Here are the skits for this week!
Rachel Maddow Cold Open
Monologue
Horsie Play
Miley Cyrus Show
Penelope Thanksgiving
Visiting the Queen
Message from TSA
The Wizard of Oz
Herb Welch
Black Friday
Camel Tame
Thanksgivies

Which measn the stats for this week are:
Abby 4
Andy 6
Bobby 7
Bill 7
Fred 4
Kristen 6
Keenan 6
Christina 4
Vanessa 3
Nasim 4
Taran 4
Jay 1
Jason 6
Paul 2

WOO. There's 12 scenes this week but we're taking Thursday off and most likely Wednesday off so we're definitely going to have to do some filming on Saturday. Yay for that I guess...still don't know what I'm doing for Thanksgiving...back to you on that when I find out...awkward....

Scarlett Johansson hosts SNL

Here's the line-up for tonight!

G-20 Cold Open
16 and Pregnant Spinoffs
~Commercial~
Millionaire Matchmaker
~Commercial~
The Manuel Ortiz Show
Unstoppable Trailer
Hollywood Dish
~Commercial~
Arcade Fire Perforamce 1
Middle School
Digital Short: Conan
Paula Deen
~Commercial~
Arcade Fire Performance 2
~Commercial~
Stars of Tomorrow
Busts
End Clap

Disturbing thing I found online, Julian Casablancas's Girlfriends' Blog, and her name is Christina spelt exactly the way mine is spelt. Either she's trying to pretend to be me, or thinks the names Julian and Christina go together well, either way it's FAKE. Don't read it and think it's real folks because if you're reading this obviously you know I'm the real deal...posers...

The show went really well last night, the crowd was great and we got a lot of laughs. I actually hadn't met Arcade Fire until last night and they're REALLY cool. I was talking to them for the after-party and they were really funny. Although like every good performance there's always some mess-ups. In the Manuel Ortiz Show they cut it off really late and so that screwed up the commercials. Then during Hollywood Dish...oh Hollywood Dish...when Bill was suppose to spit the icee on me that was the only thing that was suppose to happen, but then he took my icee and splashed it on my face and took a bowl of spaghetti and put it on top of my head....see if it was just the spitting of the icee I would've been fine but I broke character a little when I couldn't see and Bill had to move to bowl out of my eyes and the hair and icee as well and then I got a good look at Bill's face and he broke and I broke...it was pretty funny though. The last mistake was in Middle School when they AGAIN forgot to cut it off and they were just standing up there waiting to get off the stage! But it was fine it just put more pressure on them to get out of their cotumes faster. The Digital Short went WAY better than I expected, in the beginning it says that it's a joke and that Conan didn't know so the audience was laughing it's ass off. Man I wish Conan could've been there and seen it. Would've been SO funny.

After party was great too! Alec Baldwin came over and asked to use my computer and I said HELL NO because I do not give in to Conan's requests...often. But do you know what this means? Alec Baldwin also reads my blog. HEY ALEC! Yeah he's a cool guy I really like hanging out with him. Although I'm still mad at Jack McBrayer for not coming to the party because when I was on 30 Rock I told everyone to come to the parties and everyone (literally) has come, except for JACK. I'll find him just when he's filming and kick some ass.

Day 5 {Scarlett Johansson}

Yeah I know I'm late, Thursday I was filming all day and I was being pounded with homework and Friday was the saem schpeal but I also went to a Comedy Sportz match (competitive improv{we won!}) and then went with Julian out to dinner and then to HARRY POTTER 7 pt. 1!!!! IT WAS AMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAZING. Literally I cried...GOD IT WAS SO GOOD. Seriously, everyone go see it, but if you haven't seen the 6th don't bothe because then you don't know what a horcrux is...harry potter fans for the win. We have our guest for next week and it's Anne Hathaway! Very excited about that I hear she's very sweet. Also it is true I am on Conan next week, I'm not sure which day though, most likely monday or tuesday because of Thanksgiving thursday. Speaking of Thanksgiving I'm not sure what I'm doing. I've never celebrated Thanksgiving in my life so I'm not even sure what's suppose to happen! I know that families eat dinner together but, like I know I consider SNL my family but they have actual BLOOD families to attend to, I know Fred and Kristen are going to Fred parents house, Seth is going with his brother and parents, all the n00bs have their families, Abby has hers, Nasim is actually flying out to Iran or something, Bill is flying out to Oklahoma, Bobby is going to see his family in Eastchester NY, Andy is flying to California, Keenan is also flying out to California but to have it with his friends not family, and Jason is flying out to Virginia. So I don't know maybe I'll do something with Julian although he has family in Denmark too...haha heck maybe I'll go hang out with Nick Valensi!

OH LORD. Our Digital Short this week is the funniest thing ever, it was originally going to be something stupid about Model UN but now its not and I'm excited because we did it randomly. Basically what happened was at around 5PM Conan was watching TV with some of us and I leave the room get Bill and Andy to film the conference room and do my thang. So I walk into the room sobbing quietly (Bill and Andy are filming) and Conan notices,

CONAN

Christina, what's wrong?

CHRISTINA

They...they fired me.

CONAN

What?

CHRISTINA

They said that since I didn't listen to them about talking to you that I am fired for insubordination...

CONAN

No no no they can't do that they just can't that's-

CHRISTINA

It doesn't matter Conan! I should've listened to them...(tears streaming down her face) SNL is my life it's my name!! Where else am I suppose to go I have no home!

CONAN

(taking her arms in his hands) I'll get you a lawyer there's no way they can fire you over this, trust me I will do everything in my power to stop this. (he looks to the doorway behind him to see JULIAN with his hand over his mouth as KRISTEN whispers something to him {UNSCRIPTED BUT PERFECT})

CHRISTINA

(she cries in his chest) I have nothing besides this show, I'm not allowed to even be anywhere near a camera for the next 2 YEARS!

CONAN

Christina I...

CHRISTINA

You did this to me! You did! I'm so stupid oh God oh God I can't breath...

CONAN

I know (zoom in on a tear from HIS face) I'm sorry I'm so sorry...I'll fix this I promise you I wil fix this

CHRISTINA

Do you feel bad?

CONAN

Of course I feel bad, I feel like the worst person in the world...everyone kept saying that us meeting that something bad would happen but there's no way they're firing you there's no way, Christina please don't hate me...I didn't think it would ever escalate to this...

CHRISTINA

Turn around...

CONAN

What?

CHRISTINA

Turn around. (he turns around to see BILL and ANDY filming him) You're this weeks Digital Short!

CONAN

(his jaw drops and he suddenly gets angry) WHAT. I hate you guys you're all the worst (he pushes CHRISTINA away from him) Oh my God...!! I was about to get my lawyer on the phone and try to find a job at TBS just in case...AAAH! You made me CRY. I'm such a softie.

CHRISTINA

(she laughs) I feel like we're going to be best friends.

CONAN

(he sighs and puts on grimace) I know. (they both have their arms around eachother and give a thumbs-up happy expression)

I AM SO PROUD OF JULIAN. After Bill and Andy turned off the camera Julian told me that he walked in and saw that I was upset and was about to say something but Kristen got ahold of him and told him what was going on and told him to make a shocked expression because he was on camera. Oh I hope we get some good reviews on this episode...poor Conan! I felt bad about it, but he had filmed me for TWO HOURS just not paying attention and doodling on my notebook and then put it on his website, so in response I made this digital short. DON'T MESS CONAN DON'T MESS.