Babysitting

Kristen Wiig is too busy for her own good. Wherever she goes she takes Fred with her so whenever she has a task to do, and something comes up she leaves it to us to take care of it, behind Lorne's back I might add. Kristen's sister Nicole is married and has three boys, one is 14, another 10, and the other is 3. So since Nicole left it upon Kristen and Fred to babysit and Kristen had to go to a sketch comedy team's aid it was up to me to take care of these michevious children. I expressed my unwanting very much to Kristen but she said she would pay me and I wasn't doing anything for the rest of the night anyways.

It was during SAT Prep when Julian Casablancas found me. I was on part 7 (math) and there was a knock at the hotel conference room door. The teacher got up and opened it and at first I didn't look back until I heard him say "Hey, I need to steal Christina Essenelle for a bit...she needs to film". I turned and saw him in his usual leather jacket and skinny jeans, tousled hair. I only looked for a second for I still had 6 more questions to do and the whole section I only had 20 minutes on. The teacher argued back saying that I was taking an SAT and that he could come back at 5:10 when the class was over. He agreed and said he'd wait outside. When we got our five minute break after section 7 I turned directly to Nasim and she said that it was weird that he showed up and she assumed that he was the errand boy for the week. (Errand boys are guests who are so happy to be at SNL that they'll do anything to help) After the SAT was over I walked out and over to Julian who greeted me with a hug. Here's a little how it went

JULIAN

Hey, took you long enough. We gotta go.

CHRISTINA

What needs to be filmed today it's Saturday?

JULIAN

(laughing) Oh that was just an excuse to get you out early, too bad it didn't work though...

CHRISTINA

Ha ha ha, yeah if only! You should've persevered more.

JULIAN

Ha, I got a 1190 on my SAT. No Prep course.

CHRISTINA

That's not the great Julian...

JULIAN

Oh right it's different now, back then it used to be out of 1600. That's fucking crazy that it's out of 2400...what the hell do they expect us to be? Fucking genius'??

CHRISTINA

I know seriously! People nowadays...

JULIAN

Well, Kristen wants you to babysit and I thought I'd tag along, care if I do?

CHRISTINA

Only if you sing the kids to sleep.

JULIAN

(with a sly smile) How about I just sing you to sleep?

CHRISTINA

(smiling back) Sounds good.

And we left.

The appartment was small and cramped. The people lived in Long Island and the kids were absolutely insane. I spent most of my time taking care of the 3 year old whereas Julian played Call of Duty with the older ones. Although when the youngest one came rushing into the older boys room naked Julian questioned my motives.

JULIAN

Christina! And to think I let you alone with young children...how perverse you have become. I don't think you're going to get that song tonight now.

CHRISTINA

Oh hush you. He has to take a bath and he's not too happy about it.

JULIAN

That's because you're a girl, he's not gonna let some chick get up in his junk.

CHRISTINA

(laughing) Care to lend a hand then?

JULIAN

(bowing) It'd be my pleasure.

Speak of the devil he just knocked on my door. I better go be sung asleep. Ta ta for now.